Luck, Time Off, and Toxic Positivity

Hello, Friend!

Our world just seems to get heavier and heavier, making it hard some days to drag ourselves to work. If you’ve found yourself there, know that you’re not alone and that it is entirely okay to feel all those feelings. Being sad doesn’t mean something in you needs fixing; it simply means you’re human.

Too often, feeling sad is seen as something that needs to be changed. That sadness is wrong, and our goal is to be in a state of happiness all the time. But unfortunately, toxic positivity is what happens if those feelings get swept under the rug.

Rather than hide our sadness, I suggest sharing it with a trusted friend, family member, therapist, or coach. Someone who can hold space and encourages you to express what you want (and not someone who tries to fix it). 
As humans, we’re wired for ALL kinds of feelings and emotions. It’s what makes us unique, so don’t harbor it or be ashamed. 

“How do I take time off?” asked a client in a coaching session. Like many, she is a solopreneur and not yet to the point in her business where there is someone on her team to take over for her. Yet, in the year and a half since she opened her business, she’s been growing non-stop. 

While she truly enjoys her work and her clients, she is keenly aware that time off to rest and recharge is essential to her well-being. So, at about eight months, she “attempted” to take some time off, but sadly tells me she spent most of the time at the beach with her family, behind her computer working. 

On the verge of tears, she said this was affecting her home life, and her family was becoming resentful of her devotion to her business. “I keep thinking that one day I’ll have enough business to hire someone to give me the support I need to take vacations, and at the same time, I’m not sure I’ll survive until then.”

Together we came up with a strategy to speak to her clients and let them know she’d be taking a vacation. The first part of this strategy was helping her to mentally handle the vacation, not just move her workspace from home to the beach. Then, one by one, she met with her agents, planned, worked ahead, and then unplugged, knowing she’d left things in a good place. 

Upon returning home and to her office, she reported feeling like a new woman, rested, recharged, and ready to tackle her work. I asked her how clients responded to her vacation. She said, “they told me not only was it something I deserved, that it also inspired them to take one too.” 

Here’s to resting, recharging, and unplugging. Even if it’s just for a day, your body, mind, and soul will thank you.

“You’re so lucky!” “It must be nice to own your own business, work from home, have a great virtual assistant, a housekeeper, travel, and time to write a book….”

Perhaps you’ve also been the recipient of similar comments, and like me, your first response is to shrink and reply in a way that minimizes something you’re pretty proud of, like, “Oh, it’s not that big of a deal, maybe I just got lucky.”
Well, to that, I say – STOP! Stop minimizing yourself and be proud of the dreams you’ve worked hard to achieve.

When someone tells you, “It must be nice, or easy, or luck,” I propose you say, “why yes it is, would you like to do it too? I’m happy to tell you my story, and while it was challenging, it was something I wanted, so I found a way to do it.” 

One of my greatest wishes is that we stop putting others down for their accomplishments and instead lift them up and celebrate with them, especially women in business and those who wear many hats. 

When women tell stories – I loved this TedTalk by Jude Kelly

Well, this is interesting – Starbucks is a bank that sells coffee 

What Is & IS NOT a 4-Leaf Clover  YES, there is a 4-leaf clover

Who was St. Patrick? He wasn’t even Irish… 

A simple way to track all the tax deadlines? Why yes, that’s possible

How many hours at work are too many? Here’s Seth Godin’s thoughts on that

Want to hang out with other book lovers and talk about the ideas, inspiration, and wisdom gleaned from a fabulous book? Then join us for Sparks of Wisdom Book Club (and check out the next exciting book). 

I’m now offering mini-coaching packages. Learn how you can return the magical spark in your business or remove an obstacle and move closer to accomplishing your goals.

Until next time…

Hoping for a lucky break is like waiting around for that cute guy in class to call you in middle school, you know, the one who doesn’t even seem to know you exist. Sure, it’s fun to dream, but sometimes you just pick up the phone and call him yourself.

Take care, be kind and stay safe.

Best wishes,

Michelle Spalding | Small Business Coach

Michelle Spalding
Business Alchemist | Mentor | Author